Inspiring Cuteness

Jess - LOVE IT!! That was hilarious! That poor girl - not only the horrible choker, but... hello?? what was going on with her pants? Were they camo? Or were they shreds of fabric pinned together? And yes, I think if you can't get that move that it is not a terrible thing, as the move was pretty funny :) BUT I think it looks like a great workout, and a really fun way to get some good exercise! Thanks for sharing :)

My hip is better. I am really glad I didn't run on it yesterday - I think that day of rest was just what it needed. It's good for me to write that out and see it (and to have experienced it), because I can tend to drive myself too hard, not believing that rest does any significant good (I take after my dad in that sense - can be a good thing to be so persevering, but it can get out of appropriate bounds real fast). But it's clear to me that resting yesterday did help. I didn't succeed very much at massaging throughout the day - partly because when I tried in the morning I never really found the right spot, and partly because the later part of the day was spent out of the house. The other thing I want to remember in the future is using a heating pad! I finally remembered this before going to bed, and I really believe that's a big reason I feel better today.

So today I debated giving my knots another day of no exercise to work themselves out or not, but opted to go ahead and go for a run, since my hip didn't really bother me most of the day yesterday, and the knots themselves weren't feeling too bad today. I'm glad I did - at this point, nothing hurts from it. I stretched pretty well afterwards (which I'm usually terrible at doing), and massaged my back more. I did crunches (but no push-ups, just in case).

Here is a shot of one of my motivations to get out for a run. This little girl LOVES riding in the stroller. She's usually silently fascinated the whole time, and if I pause at a stoplight and peek in at her, she barely even looks at me because she's so "in the zone" gazing at all her surroundings. I love it.



(not sure why the picture looks so bad - if you click on it, the larger version is much clearer)

I give myself a B for how eating went yesterday. I didn't have any major setbacks, but in the evening I just kind of fuzzed (don't ask me for a precise definition of that word). Part of it was, the snack I chose in the afternoon ended up being quite a bit more filling than I expected, and I wasn't hungry for dinner (which is always a bummer for me - I love eating dinner as a family). And then, I'd tried a new recipe for dinner and not only did Daniel not like it, but I didn't like it! :( One little "loss" I am grieving with letting go of eating a bit more is that when a meal is disappointing, it bothers me more than it used to. It's like I make the effort to not indulge in snacks or nibbles and "save it up" for being hungry for my meal, and when the meal "lets me down," boy is that disappointing! (I'm sorry if this is kind of silly, but it helps me to try and sort all of this out here.) One thing I want to try and consciously do differently in the future if this happens, is to consider not finishing my meal. Last night I finished it anyway, but then felt very dissatisfied even though full. And, more than that, I felt mad! Mad that the meal didn't turn out, and then mad also because now I'm full of food I did not enjoy. This led to nibbling later on in the evening, as if to "make up for my loss" of a good satisfying meal by eating more (which, for the record, does not work). Instead, one obvious option for next time, would be to finish the meal but be more intentional about brushing my teeth or something afterwards and just waiting for the next meal or next time I'm hungry to eat. Or another idea would be to try stopping mid-meal and eating something else, or doing something else with the food. (For example, last night it was an Indian-style meatloaf with curry and a tahini sauce. The meatloaf itself was fine, but there was way too much tahini on top and I didn't like it. So I could probably scrape off the sauce and make a meatloaf sandwich with BBQ sauce or something that would be much more satisfying.)

Another reason for the "B" is that I didn't drink enough yesterday (largely due to being out and about).

One major victory was that I stopped at a place I love to pick up lunch (it's far away and I only go there once a month when I meet with my spiritual director, who is right up the street from it), but didn't eat past full! (which is not easy for me to do at this place) I just kept the rest in the box and had some for a snack later in the day. That's a big deal for me! I also noticed how it wasn't as extraordinary of an effort as it sometimes has been in the past to do that, which is encouraging to me.

Another thing I want to remember that I did today is eating a nice, full, satisfying breakfast (or any meal). If I eat a really good solid meal, I am about 98% less likely to snack between meals, and the amount of food I eat in a day (while still feeling satisfied) is significantly less. Sometimes I just grab something that I know isn't a full breakfast, instead of taking an extra 2 minutes to put together a complete meal, but it's like giving myself an excuse to just graze all morning because I am "finishing breakfast" (this isn't a good direction for me to go personally).

Em - I talked to Daniel about the chiropractor and he said sure! However, I'm guessing that I ought to go in when I'm in pain, right? Not after the fact? Since my hip is feeling better, should I just wait til the next time something goes wrong, or should I go in before that, even if I'm not in pain, just to make sure things are right?

Pressing Through

Friday was (hooray!) the last day of VBS. I'm really glad I was a part of it, but boy did it mess up Naomi's nap schedule (and hence her nighttime sleep schedule :( ). I did Shred Wkt 3 again. This time I actually did all the traveling push-ups and plank rows in the toughest position! That felt good! Otherwise, still using 3 lb weights. I think I did all the mtn climbers in the first set straight through, too, which was a LOT harder than I thought it would be!

Friday we went camping, and sleep was pretty bad - it was very frustrating that our one set of neighbors arrived very noisily at 10:30 pm, an hour after we'd all turned in; and then our other set of neighbors in a huge RV decided to arrive at 12:30 am, and then let their kids run around, screaming and yelling and laughing while they got their RV and generators (?) all hooked up (no joke - it was awful). But I was awake at 6:30 Saturday morning anyway, and lying in bed in a tent is not very comfortable so I decided to go for a run. I decided to just go out 10 min and turn around since I had no idea of distance. I actually came home 1:30 faster than I went out! That was very encouraging. No crunches/pushups.

Sunday I took off, as usual. But that evening we walked half a mile down to Chipotle for dinner and my hip was hurting me. It felt like my shoulder did a few weeks ago - like a tendon was being rubbed back and forth along a sharp bone or something. That's a bad description but it's the closest I can come up with. I tried stretching my gluts, which helped some, but it kept tightening back up. I am pretty sure it's my back again - sleeping in the tent tweaked my back pretty badly, so maybe that's what messed me up. But I think there are knots that are causing surrounding muscles (this time my gluts/hips) to compensate. Right now I have monthly massages (at least for a few more months - birthday gift), but I am wondering if seeing a chiropractor might be more effective. (Any input on how effective that would be, based on the problems I've described having on here?)

So no running for me today until I can get my hip feeling better. :( I actually am really sad about that, because today should have been a running day... if it were Shred, I don't think I'd feel very sad at all. :) I got down to do make myself do crunches and pushups at least, but at the first push-up I stopped, realizing if the hip injury is in fact because of knots in my back, doing pushups might also injure my shoulder like last time. So just crunches. It let me focus more on my form though, and I'm still surprised at how poor it is! So I worked on that. My "workout goal" for today is to stretch and massage as often as I can, and see if I can get the pain to go away by tomorrow.

Eating is always a lot harder for me when I have to cut back on my usual exercise. I think it's the sitting around that makes me want to snack. This morning is already weird because my routine is different, but I made myself brush my teeth after breakfast and then sit down to write this instead of reading blogs and nibbling, while Naomi naps. After this, I want to shower and get dressed, and massage a bit. Other than that, eating has continued to go well. Stress isn't the only reason I overeat, but I have been so focused on that the last couple weeks that I didn't notice myself also wanting to eat for some of the other reasons I have dealt with in the past - like boredom. So I had a few days there where hunger and fullness were fuzzy to me, and I felt a little confused about when and how much to eat. I tried to just keep re-focusing on eating normal-sized meals at normal times. A few times I felt really frustrated because I so wanted to just put something in my mouth, but I knew I was not hungry and it wasn't time for a meal or anything. I resorted to chewing gum a couple times, and ice water and doing something absorbing a few other times. Those things worked. And every time, I was so glad later, because after an hour or two, I would be hungry for my next meal! And that was very rewarding. So I'm continuing to try and take steady steps forward, and to hold my ground as sturdily as I can, without giving up because of the fuzzy times or lapses.

Re: sleep. Middle of the night is better now - other than a few nights last week when Naomi was up (and camping of course), I've been able to sleep through. I stopped taking Magnesium supplements about 10 days ago I think, because they were starting to give me nightmares (at least I think it was because of that - that seems to happen after I take any particular thing for sleep, after awhile). I worried I would start waking mid-night again, but I haven't. BUT I've begun waking early every morning, like 5:30 or 6, when Naomi sleeps til at least 6:30 or 7. That stinks. I think with all of these various sleep problems, that my sleep cycle gets disrupted once or twice, and then gets into a rut. I wish I could get out of this rut - I'm not quite sure what to do, since it seems too difficult to go back to sleep for only about 40 minutes. For now I'm just going to try and nap diligently.




Thanks Emily and Kelly for the input about the bladder issue. I think I will send a message to my midwife and ask her about it, and I have begrudgingly begun to do Kegels when I think of it. I do not love my attitude about that, by the way, but this is at least a start. :)

Jess - Yes, I have a couple weight options - 5 lb dumbbells and 3 lb spaghetti jars. :) I also had lighter spaghetti jars but don't really use those anymore. I'd like to get some heavier dumbbells for just one or two of the exercises (at this point), but haven't gotten to it yet. I've been thinking of getting 7 lb dumbbells, because 2lb seems like a good increase to me - so that it's harder but not so hard that I can't do the exercise properly. But then I'm wondering about getting just 2lb dumbbells, which I could hold simultaneously with the 5lb ones, equaling 7lb. And then maybe getting 10lb dumbbells for the really easy exercises. I don't want to end up getting tons and tons of dumbbells, but it seems like, if I can hold two dumbbells in one hand (I know I can at least do two 5's), that combo could get me pretty far - 2lb, 5lb, [7lb], 10lb, [12lb], [15lb]. Or maybe like Katie J, I'll get 3's instead of 2's.

Thanks for describing your surgery and how you got through it mentally! That is helpful to hear about, and I think if I ever had it done, that the Jesus prayer would really help me too! That's a good idea. And I'm glad to know they hold your eyes open (even if that would be a little scary) - stupid as it sounds, I remember thinking, "I just couldn't hold my eyes open! I know I'd blink and then... what would happen??" :)

Katie - That made me so sad to read your story about how you got chronic bursitis. I'm sorry! :( That's great that you've been able to work around it and still be active, while taking care of that. I mentioned on here before about watching my parents age, and seeing some things I want to emulate and others I don't. My dad was a runner and, in denial of a long-term injury, popped Excedrin on an empty stomach for years, so that he could keep running. When we were vacationing on Catalina Island one summer, his stomach finally ruptured and we all had a very very scary night, including blood everywhere and a life-flight helicopter taking him to the mainland to the nearest hospital. While I wish I could have learned this some other way, that experience really taught me that it's not worth it to me to deny injuries or bully them, but to listen to them. Luke is blessed to have a mommy who can model healthy self-care for him!

Kelly - So glad to hear you were able to eat more like you like this last week, and able to get out a lot and exercise. And so happy to hear you are (now less than) a week away from being all together as a family again!

Not Good

Tomorrow morning we start our drive out to Colorado for Jesse's sister's wedding. Last night, Edmund slept with me because he was scared and I woke up this morning with a pinched nerve in my lower back. So, I've been spending the morning trying to work it out before we hit the road tomorrow. My grand plans for a nice long run today have been switched to rotating between ice packs and stretching routines. No cardio today!!!

However, thankfully it is getting better and not worse. It stiffens up if I am not constantly stretching it. So, I'll need to remember to stretch out frequently while driving tomorrow and Friday. Please pray it heals quickly and that I am disciplined with my stretching these next few days!!!

Hi. I don't know if I'll post regularly, but my 30-Day shred arrived in the mail this week. Earlier this week I emailed Jess to thank her for the recommendation from her blog. I wrote:

I've been hemming and hawing about what to do about exercise. Even the cost of a gym membership to the YMCA with financial assistance might be a stretch for us right now--even though they have free babysitting, which has gotten positive reviews from other friends here. I thought about doing a DVD but wasn't sure I could motivate myself to jump around like a cheerleader and feel silly in my living room for 60 mins. So, I checked out your 30 Day Shred recommendation on Amazon and watched the free clip. It looked feasible. I too like weights. It didn't look like it would take a lot of coordination like all those 80's aerobics videos. So, I bit the bullet and bought it. I just finished the first workout and love it. It's just the right amount of everything. It's not too complicated, and I love the fact that it's only 20 mins! I like her pep talks, too. Hopefully I can make a habit of it. Anyhow, that's a long way of saying thanks!

My motivation for exercise: feeling alive, having energy, making the knot in my back go away, removing the slump my shoulders get from nursing, and loosing some weight.

I've done one workout. I used soup cans for weights, promising myself that I will buy some weights if I can actually make a habit of doing the DVD. I was comfortably sore after completing the workout. My second workout was supposed to be today, but I read my child a book and baked banana bread instead--we were hosting playgroup. I really need to create a new morning routine to make this work. It is more difficult to create one right now since my husband is not functioning normally; he recently realized that he has anxiety issues . . . which is why I have a knot in my back.

Right now, I'm going to go eat something because I'm still nursing.